IRISHMAN FOR HIRE

We circled the block a few times trying to find a parking space. The wind whipped through the New York City buildings and a light snow fell as my nerves started to get the best of me. Could I do this? What if we got caught? Was this really how I wanted to spend my Christmas Eve? And if I found the answers I was looking for; what if I didn’t like what I had found?

A car pulled out from a parking space up in front of me. My heart was pounding through the outer wall of my chest as I waited for the vehicle to drive away. Then I parked my car in the space that had been vacated.

Stephanie got out of the car and stood on the sidewalk waiting for me. I sat there for a moment as I contemplated my options for the last time. Then I took the key out of the ignition, took a deep breath, got out of the car and joined Stephanie on the sidewalk.

“Ready?” she asked.

The wind tore across our faces like the prickly fingers of the Wicked Witch of the West, warning us against going any further. The gray, drab, dreary day was a perfect backdrop against the frozen city and as we both shivered from the cold, I looked deep into her eyes and said, “As ready as I’ll ever be.”

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Do you hear what I hear? Do you hear roars of jubilation, celebrations, singing and cheering?! Do you hear the frustration, the heartbreak, the disappointment and the angry outbursts?! Have you heard it lately? Well if you have, you are not alone; ‘Tis the season for the fantasy football playoffs! The time of the year that is filled with the “thrill of victory and the agony of defeat!”

Depending on the rules of the fantasy football league, the playoffs either started last Sunday or they kick off this weekend. It is the point in the season when an entire year of research, preparation and super fandom come down to one week, one match up and ultimately, one do or die situation. Win the game and continue towards a championship! Lose the game and end another year of one’s life dedicated to building the perfect fantasy football franchise.

I have been a New York Giants fan all of my life. I joined my first fantasy football league in 1987 and from that first season, I have been hooked on this extremely addictive game. But it wasn’t until the mid 1990s that fantasy football really started to grab the enthusiasm of the American public. And when ESPN created an entire gaming division around fantasy sports, fantasy football exploded onto the scene as the premier attraction for men, women and children of all ages!

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Last Friday, I went to see my doctor because I had been suffering from an earache for over a week and I was concerned about the tinnitus that was ringing loudly in the affected ear. I had been swallowing Sudafed every five hours over the course of the week and felt it was time to see the doctor for two reasons; (a) my ear still hurt and (b) I was concerned with the possibility of hearing loss which has normally been associated with tinnitus.

Upon my arrival, the nurse decided to check my height, weight and vital statistics because I hadn’t been to the doctor in a while. I thought it was odd that my height, weight and blood pressure would be involved in an ear examine but I didn’t bother to argue because it was the equivalent of having my mechanic check my tire pressure while he changed my oil.

When the examination was over, there was bad news and good news to report. The Bad News? It was an ear infection and required antibiotics. The Good News? I lost another eight pounds and I have apparently grown another half an inch. I was as perplexed as you probably are about the height gain but the weight loss was not that much of a surprise to me.

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In September, a friend of mine expanded his DJ/karaoke business to a local establishment in the Quincy area. Before his first Wednesday night, he contacted a bunch of friends and asked us to come down and support him. It’s been fourteen years since I was in a band, so I didn’t need a lot of arm twisting to show up, especially after my experience in Disney World last February.

It was a large crowd of people that showed up that first night and we had so much fun, that we have been going back just about every Wednesday night since. One night in October, the tavern was packed full of people. It was a great crowd for the middle of the week and as usual, Bill called me up early to sing a couple of songs to warm up the crowd. I was having fun and I even let Bill pick songs at random to see if I could perform them without knowing what the song was before I grabbed the microphone.

During the course of the evening as I was walking back to our table after performing a song, I lost track of the waitress and wanted to refill my glass of Coke. So I grabbed my empty glass, walked up to the bar and asked the bartender for a refill. As I was standing there waiting for the bartender to bring back my drink, I felt a finger tapping me on my shoulder.

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